Why adults date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded issue that no one wants to chat about, that’s it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on since the beginning of the world. Extramarital affairs can be filled with troubles, cause misery, and other problems. Plus you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety thing, money, age dissimilarity, faith education, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this post I will identify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, discreet dating for married.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking extramarital affairs. I am sure typically though it is only the human state, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us escape the real world for a brief period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people can turn the desire on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos society has erected against extramarital affairs. For many people the yearnings will overcome their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but the public as well. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is terribly good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not harm your spouse or anyone else? You will need to lessen the danger you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest group, very big actually. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they are comfy in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to look after. Your assets are so tangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that stop them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their othere half. An extramarital affair occasionally solves the trouble while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a frequent reason I fear. One or the other, as a rule the husband is sexually neglecting his spouse for a large humber of reasons. As a male I really am thankful to you guys neglecting your girls and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “hot milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, could be caring is disappeared, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Maybe we have simply developed distantly, our general interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is conflicting of what you want. Could be I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for economic gain, for retribution and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.